Yesterday, my daughter asked my son to help her come up the slide. She intentionally pulled him down and he hit his cheek on the slide. As I comforted him, I explained that she should not have done that. I also comforted her while she cried. After a few minutes, I stood her up and explained that if you ask for help you do not pull someone down. It is not nice and it hurts the person helping you more than it does to you.
I was thinking about the actions taken and I reflected back to some instances where I helped people but their attitudes were harmful. They were not appreciative of what I shared with them. It is not only me but those who share their talents, expertise and knowledge to those who ask. This behavior does not really make me sad, it makes me angry that people who hurt others after being helped or provided support would intentionally do this. What they do not realize is by hurting others, they hurt themselves. By limiting their support, they limit others ability to access that support.
It does probably explain why it is the way it is now in the deaf community when it comes to 'me'. I look into factors why this would happen and there is not one answer to the issue, but a multitude of factors that are tied into a group of people who are bilingual-bicultural, varying levels of language/communication access, support from communities and/or families and so on.
Many professionals, family members will consider the deaf child a child for life, not realizing that what a child experiences in their upbringing will be brought into their adulthood. This is the prevalent reason for the Crab Theory.
To Be Whole
Currently I am an ASL teacher at a local college and at an high school. I received my Masters in Sign Language Education from Gallaudet University. At home, I am an activist within the community, Northwest Indiana. My son is in first grade and my daughter goes to E.C.L.I.P.S.E. ASL Preschool. Change begins with you and change is effective with a team.